The Indian Express, in an editorial, was rather vague on what ‘stature’ means. But we in the BJP have no such doubts. Yes, I certainly believe Vice-President Hamid Ansari lacks the stature to be president. Did he ever announce that if he was not nominated for the high post, he would shave off his hair, wear only white, eat nothing but chana and sleep on the ground outside Rashtrapati Bhavan? Everyone blames me without understanding what I meant by ‘stature’. It means different things to different people. One tabloid pointed out that by not agreeing to a paternity test, the former UP chief minister, 86-year-old N.D. Tiwari, lost stature. We in the BJP admired his earlier ‘achievement’, strength and stamina.
It wasn’t that I had spoken ‘out of turn’ also, as suggested by the Hindu which also lavished praise on Ansari. We in the BJP know everything about him. Who says we are anti-Muslim? The BJP is ready to field our two ‘showcase’ Muslim MPs, Mukthar Abbas Naqvi and Shahnawaz Husain, who are full of youthful dynamism and stature. Frankly speaking, I never saw much of stature or dignity in the Rashtrapati Bhavan. The BJP often organises protest marches and submits memoranda to the president. There was nothing great about the place, the president was always on tour with a brood of her family and children. Anyone can do this.
I can write freely in my diary that if I had my way, one man could function both as PM and president. It’s none other than our great, glorious leader, Narendra Modi, under whose leadership Ahmedabad became the Indian city with the highest consumption of ice-cream. Modi is so efficient, so development-oriented that he can handle both jobs and create a new India. From 8 am to 5 pm, he can function as the prime minister, handle official papers, sign files, take decisions, attend Parliament for a few hours and meet important people like Ramdev baba. From 6 pm to 10.30 pm, he could be the president at Rashtrapati Bhavan, following protocol, signing papers put before him, going for banquets, attending national awards functions and so on. These are not strenuous jobs and Modi is in good health. Mind you, in Ram Rajya, Lord Ram was king, PM, president and so on.
And look at the benefits our great nation will get through this. Modi has great stature, like a Chenghiz Khan or Nadir Shah. With the same person as PM and president, the nation will save a lot of money while handling more work. Narendra Modi will undertake foreign trips without family, complete official assignments and also handle ceremonial duties. Let me see how the US dare deny a diplomatic visa to him then. A man who rebuilt Gujarat can rebuild India in no time and make it outstrip the US in ice-cream production and consumption. He’ll be the first-ever PM-cum-president, the world at his feet and leaders like Obama and the new French president vying to woo him.
The Mumbai-based satirist is the creator of ‘Trishanku’; E-mail your secret diarist: vgangadhar70 AT gmail.com
