“Silent about virtue and swift to act wrongly/ A man may yet be declared good who does not slander others.” Thus spoke the great Tamil poet, Thiruvalluvar. And I quote him not because I am P. Chidambaram about to present the budget but because I am hurt. Deeply hurt. All this mud-slinging and downsizing Pokhran-II to 1.5 goes against our great tradition of exaggeration. Look at our cinema, our TV, our mythology—everything is larger than life. Then why not a bomb? This Santhanam chap—he may be a great scientist—should realise a bomb is a bomb whether its yield is 45 or 25 kilotonne. Just like they say in my hometown, Rameshwaram, a brinjal is a brinjal whether it’s 5 grams or 10. So, repeat before and after me—if one is not enough, go for one more. The same holds true for bombs. Size does not matter Santhanam—why do you think the Americans christened that thing they dropped on Hiroshima ‘Little Boy’. Also, when I was 12, I developed an ‘atom bomb’ for a crackerwallah from Sivakasi and guess what—the smallest one was the loudest!
Since I am in a mood to reminisce, let me tell you a story. In Rameshwaram, there used to be a palmist who sat under a banyan tree. He predicted I would build missiles, bombs and make the expression ‘Repeat after me’ popular in the school and college circuit. Incidentally, after Pokhran-II, I proclaimed that ‘India is now a superpower’ and delivered my favourite ‘repeat after me’ punchline and Vajpayeeji obliged. He was convinced we had joined the big league. And now Homi Sethna says I can’t comment on Pokhran-II since I don’t know physics! Well, my dear friend, who can claim to know physics in its entirety? The universe is full of unexplained mysteries. Now tell me, if moths are attracted to the light, why don’t they fly towards the sun? Or why does Mohan Bhagwat say the RSS has nothing to do with the BJP? And why do Delhi’s drivers blow the horn when the signal is red? No one knows. So, Sethnaji and Iyengarji, we mustn’t run each other down. Instead, just enjoy the bomb. Or as a schoolboy put it—have a blast.
Coming away from Pokhran, now with vested interests trying to undermine me, I hope at least my contribution to cricket is recognised by the world. The IPL, a source of joy to millions, would not have happened without my 20-20 vision. Apparently, Lalit Modi was inspired by my book about the future, particularly the chapter ‘Can India Become A Developed Country?’ I am told the idea of the IPL came to him in a flash. And the good thing was he translated it into action. Incidentally, my poem ‘Village development is key to nation development’ is a hot favourite of Rahul Gandhi although the Congress does not want to admit this. Anyway, let me leave you with a few inspiring lines from Thiruvalluvar: “If those who think to achieve/Have a firm and focused mind/They will realise what they thought of.”
(As imagined by Ajith Pillai)
