As I close my eyes to look for you
After you refused to open yours
The red light just fades,
As the silent shrill in the head rises
Till it becomes dark and darker
Just when the hollow dark in my navel
Becomes a black hole
And flings out of my belly
This ugly black chord
Suppurating blood and slime and mud
The chord twirls and snakes around me
Sharp as a blade
And stabs and spears through my flesh
Slicing halves of me
One writhing in pain
The other, cold and blue,
Stoned, unmoved
Watching silently,
Smiling cruelly
From afar
And then
Suddenly
The chord throws together the sliced two
Together, yet unsewn, and shoving away the other
Sweating, I open my eyes
And head to make some coffee
As I sit down and hear my gulps
In between loud heart thuds
Some coffee drips from the fine cracks
Of the unsewn togethers
And as I wipe the floor
Some dark slime drips from the chord
And splashes on the floor.
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(Vineeta Sharma is Associate Professor (Economics) at Kirori Mal College, University of Delhi)
