“When a man is being misogynistic and you show that in a way that incites applause, then that’s glorification. (If) you make the audience think (about) whether he’s done the right thing or not, then you’re collaborating with the audience. There, there is cinema, there is a dialogue. But the other one is almost spoon-feeding you that this is okay. I remember sitting through such a film in the theatre as a teenager and squirming, but everyone was clapping. I was very confused.”
These words of 35-year-old South Indian actress Parvathy Thiruvothu at a roundtable discussion on Film Companion in 2019, while picking apart what was wrong with films such as Kabir Singh and Arjun Reddy and the misogynistic characters they glorified, struck the right chord with many.
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Born and brought up in Kozhikode, she is known to be outspoken and unapologetic about her views and her personality. Known for her performances in Malayalam movies like Take Off, Charlie, Koode, Bangalore Days, Ennu Ninte Moideen, Notebook, among others, she became the first ever Indian actor to receive the Special Jury Award for Best Female Actor at the International Film Festival of India. But in 18 years since her debut, she has only done 29 films, declining many projects that propagate patriarchy or misogyny.
She refuses to fit into the ideal beauty standards of being the right amount of curvy. While shooting for her first Telugu project called Dhootha last year, she expressed her displeasure at being asked to wear a tight police uniform. “How much Spanx can I wear! But no, it had to be…” she said while gesturing with her hands the shape of a curvy body. She insisted on a comfortable costume and was called a “difficult person”.
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In a profession where such expectations of looking a certain way run high, Thiruvothu, in her Bollywood debut Qarib Qarib Single, portrayed an everyday girl. She likes playing roles where she can keep her little moustache, not have cut eyebrows, have her double chin, and her unmanicured nails, “so that women will think, ‘Ye meri kahani hai’,” she said in an interview with film critic Anupama Chopra.
