There is no other profession which could have given methe same fulfillment than representing my country. It was a privilege and honourto have donned the colours of my country all these years.
The first thing that comes to my mind is to thank allthe people who I feel were instrumental in shaping my career. The list can go ononly to suggest that I was a mere representative of the belief of the people.
Fourteen years of cricket have passed by, but thedesire to play will always remain as fresh as it was at the beginning of mycareer. I am sure the desire will continue to persist all my life.
Advertisement
Time had come where I had to choose between my desiresand the harsh realities of life. Quitting cricket will remain as my hardest decisionso far.
Cricket as a profession is an intense career. The mindis always preoccupied whereas the body relentlessly strives for perfection.Cricket being a great leveller has always taught us new lessons.
If the ignominy of defeat, the criticism, the sense of loss of pride, theanxieties of the future and the state of rejection are some of the dreadedfacets of cricket, the adulation, the heart-felt appreciation, thehero-worshipping and exposures are some of its better attributes.
On the whole, be it success or failure there was something new and more to learn from this great game.
Advertisement
My best times of cricket came in the last few years. Myprovisional exit from the one-day games every now and then was with a purpose.
As my body would not take the load with the amount ofcricket we played, it was imperative that we had few international qualitybowlers sharing the responsibilities.
A rotation system would have been the best thing tohappen but somehow that idea never appealed to the selectors. With very littlechoice I had to stay away from one-dayers to stay fit to contribute in a veryobjective manner.
As my earlier retirement announcement appeared to belittle premature under the circumstances, it was the belief of my teammates inme that made me reconsider the decision.
Though playing in the World Cup final was the biggestmoment in life, but the way we progressed to the final would be the mostmemorable one. I had bench-marked the World Cup as my final destination, but thedefeat in the final brought the Australian series back into my focus.
I did realise that it required nothing less than my peak fitness to be acontributor on this tough tour. The right knee which had been a weak-link of allmy joints, would not heed to any amount of rehabilitation and strengtheningexercise.
After more than a decade of international cricket, onlya fit body can have a fit mind. It was impossible to think of playing whilehaving reservations and fears about my own fitness.
Advertisement
I, always practiced, appreciated and respected peoplewith high team values, hence my decision of retiring was important.
Only had I got this knee set right in time, it wouldhave been a great pleasure to be a part of the Indian team fighting for honoursDown Under.
Although quitting the game was emotionally hard, thereis a sense of achievement in conquering my desires. I hope this decision ofretirement will help me build a new career. Not to forget my real liferetirement is as far as 26 years away.
I have enjoyed the game to the fullest without anyregrets. Yes, I have succeeded at times and have not at times, but today I cantouch my heart and say that I have played it hard and gave it all.
Advertisement
I express my sense of gratitude to one and all formaking this wonderful career of mine possible. I owe it to everyone.
PTI
