The Udderworld

AS a child, minister for science and technology Murli Manohar Joshi witnessed the amazing spectacle of people drinking cow urine "straight from the source". He made this revelation before a stunned audience at an Indian National Science Academy meet last year. Joshi confided that at that time he too thought it "dirty". But years of academic training and ideological proximity to the RSS/VHP has clearly convinced him that such "ancient practices" have a strong scientific basis.

Given the minister's faith in the cow, it's no wonder that theories such as "earthquakes are caused by the indiscriminate slaughter of cows" find resonance in some institutions presided over by the HRD ministry, which portfolio too Joshi holds. The 'scientist' who arrived at the conclusion that all seismic upheavals are caused by cow slaughter is Permanand Mittal of the Bharatiya Govansh Rakshan-Sanvardhan Parishad. In a booklet ('Goraksha, Atmaraksha, Rashtraraksha—A factual scientific evaluation'), Mittal quotes an unknown research paper by two Delhi University professors: "When she sees her children getting ruthlessly slaughtered, the mother earth screams and writhes in agony. That's what becomes an earthquake."

Apart from publishing such booklets and manufacturing products from cowdung and urine that have mythical healing properties, the stated goal of the VHP and its multiple subsidiaries such as the Go Vigyan Anusandhan Kendra (Cow Science Research Centre) in Nagpur is to establish a "firm scientific basis of eco-friendly, cow-centred economics".

VHP offices have retail outlets for 'magic potions' and organic powders with 'divine' healing powers. There are 32 such products, ranging from shampoos, soaps, cough syrups and digestives to cures for obesity, piles, gastric ulcers and skin problems. Customers are encouraged to call up the kendra in Nagpur to discuss in detail their health problems and find the correct cow-centric therapy.

To popularise urine therapy, the VHP and its affiliates plan to set up one lakh therapy centres all over the country. Over 200 such centres have already been established in 18 states. Most of these centres and labs are located in Gujarat and MP. The Union government's promise to impose a nationwide ban on cow slaughter may be the beginning of a high-decibel campaign for cow protection.

Assisting them in their endeavour to scientifically prove the divinity of the cow are the csir, the National Environmental Engineering Research Institute (NEERI), the Central Drug Research Institute (CDRI) and the National Botanical Research Institute (NBRI).

The CSIR helped the Anusandhan Kendra get a US patent for a product made from distilled cow urine that apparently enhances the efficacy of antibiotics and cancer drugs. While this achievement in itself is not significant given that there are over 100 patents for human and cow urine, the CSIR's active involvement in the kendra's activities gives it a stamp of scientific approval. Both csir director general R.A. Mashelkar and Joshi were present at the ceremony where the announcement about the patent was made in Delhi in July 2002.

Anusandhan Kendra officials in Nagpur stress that they are working in close coordination with government institutes to prove that the cow is the "ultimate saviour" of the human race. "There are a number of projects we are working on with institutes like the CSIR, NEERI, NBRI and CDRI. We are committed to ensure that everything that our ancient texts said about the cow has a scientific basis," says director Sunil Mansimghka.