Are You A Communist? Internet Says Yes!

When Guru Dutt, playing the role of a struggling artist, speaks of the destitution and poverty plaguing those who sleep on footpaths with nothing to eat, Lalita Pawar’s character asks, “Are you a communist?”

In the now iconic dialogue from the movie Mr And Mrs 55 (1955), Dutt smiles and responds, “No, I am a cartoonist.”

When the then New York mayoral candidate Zohran Mamdani rode a city bike in Manhattan, a passerby yelled “communist” as an insult to him. He smiled and replied, “It’s a cyclist.”

From 1955 to 2025, not much has changed in how “communist” is used as an insult.

To be or not be (a communist) is the question, but accusing any person speaking of “rights” and equality as a “commie” is the answer, always, at least on social media and sometimes IRL (for non-cool folks, that’s “in real life”).

While creativity seems to have died a thousand deaths in insults like these, it is not even correct half the time. Because why do you have a person yelling “commie bi***” under a woman’s reel about the rights of a married woman in India? My good sir, the faceless enigma, did he mean “feminist” by any chance?

Like all things good and bad about society at large, we can blame shows and movies for this as well. When the titular character of BoJack Horseman (undoubtedly the top… well, let’s not digress) rhymes ‘commie’ with ‘slap my salami’, there’s definitely a pattern of the ‘red scare’ in films and TV.

For your reference, and it may come as a surprise to many, communism, socialism, feminism, and all other isms are not interchangeable monikers to be lauded onto any “freethinker.”

A good haven of socialist/communist ‘allegations’ online is where people, especially women, advocate not burning children to death in Gaza. Asking for rights for Palestine and saying things like "Refugees must be given shelter" unfurl red banners in the reader’s/viewer’s mind. Same with women who request not to be killed and raped, or disallowed participation in the public space. A woman wanting to walk near her home after 9 PM freely is a harbinger of ‘nazi socialism and feminism’ in this country.  

A female activist standing in front of bulldozers that want to tear down a forest is what, then?  Or a person advocating for homeless people in Delhi should not be made to shiver and die in the cold and be provided with help by the government? That person has to be a commie, surely?

So maybe we should have a look at what, so we can accurately use these terms as an insult more appropriately.

But first, a few anecdotes. CPIM Politburo member and general secretary of the Kisan Sabha, Vijoo Krishnan, was once attending a seminar in Geneva. The discussion was lively, everyone presented their opinions on that democratic stage, and Krishnan, in his speech, spoke ill of legacies such as Monsanto.

The story of Monsanto is long, so the best TL;DR version is this: a big capitalist company pushing GMO seeds on poor countries and taking away rights from poor farmers.

After he exited the stage, Krishnan was approached by a well-meaning professor who asked, “Are you a communist?” He laughs now as he recalls this memory, but then quotes Brazilian Archbishop Dom Helder Camara. The archbishop had once said, ‘When I feed the hungry, they call me a saint. When I ask why they have no food, they call me a communist.’ Krishnan says, “The quote explains effectively the distinction between charity—which is generally accepted and praised—while addressing systemic inequality is unacceptable to ruling classes.”

Unlike capitalism, liberalism, or other political theories, people tend to view socialism and communism within the absolute boundaries of the original texts. It is rather funny, though, that the scary communists and socialists who are dictators and tyrants are now equated with every person who speaks remotely in favour of the poor or minorities having rights.

If this writer could humbly share a personal anecdote, the first time I was called a communist was at the age of 13, when I said my neighbour fully had a right to divorce her abusive husband. Guess Karl Marx wrote about that, though I wouldn’t reference any of that at 13 now, would I?

Who Is A Commie Socialist Then?

 Is having blue hair a sure sign of a commie-feminazi? Apparently, on social media, yes. Wear glasses and read a book on inequality? Clearly plotting the downfall of capitalism. Post a thread about universal healthcare? You’re halfway to Gulag membership already. It’s as if every opinion that challenges the unquestioned superiority of the free market is immediately coded in neon red.

But let’s pause for a second. What is a communist, a socialist, a feminist—or, for that matter, a human being with a basic sense of decency? The answer is embarrassingly simple: none of the above are insults, and all of them are far more nuanced than your average YouTube troll or angry uncle on WhatsApp can process.

A communist, historically speaking, is someone who believes in common ownership of the means of production. That doesn’t mean they want to steal your iPhone or take away your Netflix subscription – or buffaloes. A socialist advocates for social ownership and welfare mechanisms, not necessarily the nationalisation of your local coffee shop. A feminist believes in gender equality and human rights for all. And yes, combining these labels doesn’t automatically summon a world-ending revolution or a dystopian state where everyone is forced to hug trees at gunpoint.

Yet here we are, in 2025, where calling someone a “commie” is the lazy equivalent of a Shakespearean insult like “thou pribbling ill-nurtured knave”—except it’s been dumbed down, globalised, and exported to Twitter threads, Instagram reels, and LinkedIn debates. People fling these terms without a thought, as if memorising Marxist terminology automatically qualifies as political critique. Spoiler: it doesn’t.

And the irony is thick. Those who shout the loudest about “Commie!” are often the same ones who have never opened Das Kapital, don’t know what social democracy entails, and think socialism means everyone gets a free Lamborghini. Meanwhile, someone quietly advocating for labour rights or affordable healthcare gets a digital spit take and a lifetime ban from casual conversation with the internet’s most discerning intellectuals: angry commenters.

So, what’s the takeaway? Maybe the real communists, socialists, and feminists are those who actually do the work, such as analysing policy, fighting for equitable laws, and supporting communities—not just yelling slogans from a keyboard. And maybe, just maybe, the next time you feel the urge to call someone a commie, step back and ask, ‘Am I criticising their ideas, or am I just trying to sound edgy?’

Because Guru Dutt had it right in 1955, and Zohran Mamdani in 2025—sometimes a cartoonist is just a cartoonist, and a cyclist is just riding a bike.

The digital age might have made insults faster, louder, and easier, but it has, unfortunately, not made them any more accurate. If we really want to keep the tradition alive, perhaps it’s time to start using terms thoughtfully, not just as shorthand for “I disagree and it scares me.” After all, nothing kills a debate faster than slapping an ideological label onto someone who’s just asking for fairness.

So yes, next time someone asks: “Are you a communist?” or “You must be a socialist feminist,” feel free to smile, sip your tea or vodka, and say exactly what you are (or aren’t). It’s unlikely you’re plotting world domination from a 2BHK in Delhi while using an iPhone anyway. You might just be someone who wants a slightly less absurd world; for minorities not be punished for the crime of their identity, for women not to be raped and killed for the crime of being a woman, or for children not be bombed to shreds in Gaza. And in 2025, that alone might be revolutionary enough.