Conan O'Brien Oscars Monologue Highlights 'Frightening Times', Ribs Timothée Chalamet

Conan O'Brien's cheeky opening monologue at the Academy Awards 2026 took jabs at Hollywood, Timothée Chalamet, AI, US healthcare, tense politics, major industry figures including Netflix CEO Ted Sarandos.

O’Brien kicked off the show with a pre-taped segment where he was made up as Amy Madigan’s Aunt Gladys from Weapons, interrupting scenes from Best Picture nominees as he’s pursued by the film’s killer kids. Just minutes after the sketch aired, Madigan garnered the Best Supporting Actress Oscar.

He began with a tongue-in-cheek remark about technology’s growing influence in entertainment. “I am Conan O'Brien and I am honored to be the last human host of the Academy Awards,” O'Brien joked. “Next year it's going to be a Waymo in a tux.” He joked about Timothée Chalamet’s recent ballet and opera comments that became controversial online. “Security is very tight tonight,” O’Brien quipped. “There’s concerns about attacks from the ballet and opera communities.” He then addressed Chalamet, saying, “They’re just mad you left out jazz.” O’Brien also teased that, “I should warn you: Tonight could get political. Okay? And if that makes you uncomfortable, there’s an alternate Oscars being hosted by Kid Rock. It’s at the Dave & Buster’s down the street.”

He compared Ted Sarandos to Dr. No when he joked that the Netflix CEO must be so confused why everyone is having so much fun in a theater. (“They should be home alone, where I can monetize it!”). ​He also tore into the dire straits of US healthcare: “In Hamnet, Shakespeare’s wife gives birth by herself in the woods – or what we call in America affordable healthcare.”

Sinners director Ryan Coogler wasn't spared either for declining to become a voting member of the Academy because “he doesn’t like judging his fellow artists’ work,” prompting O’Brien to say to the rest of the members, “Yeah, but the rest of you pricks seem to love it.”

He referenced the furore surrounding the Epstein files when he made a point about the absence of any British acting nominees.

“For the first time since 2011, there are no British actors nominated,” O’Brien said, adding: “But at least they arrest the pedophiles over there.”

However, O' Brien concluded the monologue on a more sober note, highlighting the international import of the awards. “Everyone watching right now, around the world, is all too aware that these are very chaotic, frightening times,” he said. "It’s at moments like these that I believe The Oscars are particularly resonant. 31 countries across six continents are represented this evening. And every film we salute is the product of thousands of people speaking different languages, working hard to make something of beauty. We pay tribute tonight not just to film but to the ideals of global artistry, collaboration, patience, resilience, and that rarest of qualities today, optimism. So let us, please, celebrate not because we think all is well but because we work and hope for better in the days ahead.”

The 62-year-old, a former writer for The Simpsons and Saturday Night Live, a longtime talk show host across several networks, previously hosted the Emmy Awards twice in 2002 and 2006. O’Brien returned to host the Oscars after doing it for the first time last year. O' Brien closed the show with a filmed tribute to One Battle After Another, featuring Saturday Night Live icon Jim Downey.