IF Richard Milhous Nixon's ouster from the Oval Office was essentially because of 'Deep Throat', an inside source who leaked sensitive information to the media about the Watergate scandal, William Jefferson Clinton's banishment from the White House might well be because he was deep-throated several times by a starry-eyed intern in an ante-room next to the Oval Office.
Lurid instances of Clinton's kinky sexploits with buxom Monica Lewinsky, the intern, inside the taxpayer-funded White House are still supposed to be well-guarded secrets only known to members of the Grand Jury hearing the 'Zippergate' scandal and a select group of lawyers headed by Judge Ken Starr, who is investigating the case.
But details of sex, semen, silk and sin within the hallowed confines of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, a place of pilgrimage in the nation's capital for American tourists, have begun to ooze out. These details, though, haven't yet become news in American 'mainstream' newsmedia, which are pretty squeamish when it comes to dealing with steamy ingredients of red-hot presidential sexploits with a nubile one.
Using the longest bargepole it could find to 'touch' the sizzling details, Newsweek magazine would only write: "Starr is known to believe that the public will be deeply offended by some of the kinkier details. 'When people read his report, they'll want to throw up,' said a knowledgeable source."
Despite this self-censorial attitude of the mainstream media over what really happened between Clinton, 52, and Monica, 25, during their 18-month-long secret affair, nuggets of details have appeared in racy tabloids, Internet websites and talk radio. And, of course, in salons where politicos and newsmen gather for a pint or a shot of single malt beverage.
For instance, political cognoscenti 'Inside-the-Beltway' (the loop of road that imprisons Washington, D.C.) will allude to the so-called 'Cigar Story'. Almost all self-respecting newsrooms in the East Coast know the 'Cigar Story'. But no one wants to 'touch' it—perhaps a case of American puritanism clouding professional news judgment.
On the more libertarian Internet, 'Gonzo-Journalists' have no pretense of such Palaeolithic puritanism. Matt Drudge, a pioneering muckracker on the Net, broke the 'Cigar Story' on his Drudge Report: "In a bizarre daytime sex session, that occurred just off the Oval Office in the White House, President Clinton watched as intern Monica Lewinsky reportedly masturbated with his cigar.
"It has been learned that several major news organisations have confirmed the shocking episode and are now struggling to find ways to report the full Monica Lewinsky/Bill Clinton grossout. Media Bigfeet are trying to reconstruct one sex session that reportedly took place as Yasser Arafat waited in the Rose Garden for his scheduled meeting with the president!
"According to multiple sources close to the case, President Clinton allegedly masturbated as Lewinsky performed the sex show with his cigar in a small room off the Oval Office. It is not clear if Clinton or Lewinsky kept the cigar, or if Lewinsky testified on the specifics of the encounter before a Federal Grand Jury... Lewinsky's testimony has been described as graphic, and included unusual practices."
Drudge, who has often poked his finger at the mainstream media by breaking 'World Exclusives', added that he had been "briefed on these shocking details that have stunned all those who have heard them and investigated them—details that now threaten to completely disgust and stun the American electorate. "
Then there's the Semen-Stained Blue Cocktail Dress Story. The media has reported it, Starr asked for it and got it from Monica and now the FBI has analysed it for DNA and that report, perhaps nailing Clinton's DNA trail, is under lock and key. But what really happened and how did it happen?
Here's as detailed an account as one has read—in the racy supermarket checkout-counter tabloid, the Star—ever since the scandal erupted earlier this year. In the account, Monica is quoted as telling a close friend of hers that the dress "became stained by Clinton after she (Monica) deliberately aroused him in his study off the Oval Office."
The friend, who was, of course, unidentified, quoted Monica as saying: "We were embarrassed when he did that to my dress. And I was scared to death that one of the Secret Service men standing guard outside would see it. I kept my hand over it when I walked out—but my knees were really knocking."
MORE details of the Clinton ejection were provided by columnist Alexander Cockburn in the New York Press: "According to close family friends of Lewinsky, the semen stain is on one of the shoulders of the Gap dress.... That shoulder stain doesn't rescue the Clinton-Lewinsky embraces from ambiguity. There are at least three sexual postures in which the presidential member (penis) could have been set on this arc of detonation, and Starr's forensic investigators still have to factor in the notorious kink (penile abnormality) in Clinton's launcher."
The columnist also wrote about the 'CigarStory' saying: "...one of the things Bill liked to have Monica do in her intimate stripteases in the tryst-chamber next to the Oval Office was to put a cigar up her p...., which could thus end up as an Article of Impeachment. It's the old smoked-but-didn't inhale theme, surfacing once more."
A British paper, the Independent, in an account of the sex scandal said: "Talk of Ms Lewinsky dancing naked for the President's delectation, the multiple uses of a presidential cigar and the unprintable etiquette of 'phone sex' have done the rounds of the media drinks circuit for several months.
"Now that the President has admitted an 'inappropriate' relationship and so many of the details contained in the leaked excerpts of Ms Lewinsky's taped confessions have turned out to be true, there is a widespread belief that the baser details will eventually come out. The only question is how, and how soon."
For instance, the Star reported Monica telling a friend: "He (Clinton) said that what we were doing 'isn't really sex, Monica' and when I went and looked up sex in the dictionary I became a little confused but I eventually came to the same decision—though, deep down, I knew what the truth was."
"The sex was quick and fast," Monica reportedly told her friend, adding: "But to me it meant everything because I loved him." Apparently, all of Monica's intimate moments involved only "groping, fondling, kissing and oral sex," including once on the back seat of a black presidential limousine.
"I'd always begged him to take me out somewhere," Monica said, "though I knew we really couldn't go to a restaurant or a movie or anything like that." Of the limo ride, Monica said: "I felt so loved and important that night." Monica tells her friend: "I turned against her (Mrs Hillary Clinton) after Bill told me, 'My wife does not satisfy my needs. She's just not interested in what I'm."
Monica asserted that she had sex with Clinton the very first day she worked in the West Wing near the Oval Office. "Bill's reputation was no secret. So I knew he'd pick up on my signals—I'd wear something low-cut, once I flashed him a peek at my thong panties—and sure enough he did. I knew that if we were alone something was going to happen—and it did. I wore a very sexy dress my first day and it did the trick. We never said a word to each other until he signaled for me to join him in his office. He passed by me three times that day and on the third time gave me a signal to meet him in his office.... It was a total turn-on. It was so sexy that first time." Monica added: "I wanted him—and I got him."
Could anybody have seen the Clinton-Monica trysts? Apparently yes. The tabloid National Enquirer reported: "Secret peepholes drilled into the walls of the Oval Office and the President's private study may have allowed Secret Service agents to spy on President Clinton and Lewinsky..... A White House insider has revealed that as many as a dozen peepholes are located throughout the mansion's West Wing, including the President's office and his private suite of adjoining rooms."
"The President can't go anywhere without Secret Service agents knowing where he is every minute," said the insider. "Even when he wants to go off by himself in his private study or have a closed-door meeting in the Oval Office, agents can see him from strategically-placed peepholes. At least one peephole allows a complete view of the small study that's now the most talked about room in the world."
In a commentary in the Village Voice weekly, essayist Karen Cooper wrote: "The First Adulterer's real crime is that he didn't take advantage of his wrecked presidential image by also blowing American sexual hypocrisy to smithereens. If Clinton had called a blowjob a blowjob, he might have started an adult conversation about sex, relationship, power, and privilege. He might have helped remake America as a nation that could have real scandals, like (in) Italy or Japan.... Clinton could have contributed something really useful to the public exchange in that (mea culpa) speech of his."