April 03, 2020
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Afternoon Delight

94% Indians under 45 say their sex life rocks. How do middle-aged Indians balance family, friends, career, travel, fantasy, fitness — and still have all the fun?

Afternoon Delight
Narendra Bisht
Afternoon Delight

By some tacit convention, the word ‘sex’ is associated with the idea of being young. Sex for the older folks is a category that traditionally goes unnamed—if at all, only in terms of an age where you begin to experience a plateau or a tapering-off of desire. Myths, however, need have little to do with facts, as our opinion poll among middle-aged urban Indians shows. It not only reveals a sexually active generation, but a contented one: 93.9 per cent reported being ‘satisfied’ or even ‘very satisfied’ with their sex lives. Indeed, sex seems to get better with age: over 90 per cent of those polled said sex is just as good, even better. Rather than any sign of the ardour cooling (over a third said they have sex between 11 and 20 times a month), the sexual canvas is widening—over 70 per cent feel more open to experimentation than they were five years ago. Inhibiting factors—children, work, health—persist, but a new wired world has opened doors.

  • 92% in Ahmedabad said they are satisfied with their current sex life, only 1% said they are “very satisfied”. No one said he or she is dissatisfied.
  • 73% in Jaipur said they were “very satisfied”, the highest number. Patna had the highest number of “very dissatisfied” at 9%.
  • 11-20 times a month is the most common frequency, with the highest number (33.4%) of respondents saying that’s how often they have sex.
  • 8% in Patna—that’s the highest number for a city of those who have sex less than once a month. Patna also has the highest number (8%) of those who have sex more than 30 times a month.

  • 48.5% is the highest number of respondents, in Kochi, whose partners suspect them of infidelity, followed by Mumbai (47.6%). Ahmedabad (12%) had the most trusting partners.
  • 85.3% in Bangalore are open to discussing each other’s fantasies. Ahmedabad, at 13%, was the least open to the idea.
  • 86.5% females have never had sex with someone other than their spouse; for males, the figure is 62.5%. In Ludhiana, 53.9% have had sex with someone other than their spouse. In Patna, only 4% have had sex with someone other than their spouse.

  • 99% in Kochi, 98% in Ahmedabad and 96% in Calcutta are more open to sexual experimentation now than they were five years ago. As against this, only 34% in Delhi said yes.

  • 25.2% men have had cybersex with someone they’ve never met as against only 8.7% women. In Jaipur, 37% have had cybersex with unknown people, none have done so in Kochi, Mumbai.
  • 58.3% have got physically intimate with people they have met online. All respondents in Chennai replied in the affirmative.
  • 24.5% men have been intimate with friends, as opposed to only 9.4% women. In Ahmedabad, 45% respondents have had sex with friends, none in Patna and Chennai have done so. In Kochi, 93.1% have used medication/therapy to enhance sexual pleasure.

Methodology: The Outlook-Durex survey was conducted by market research agency MDRA. A structured questionnaire was presented to a random selection of 1,212 respondents across 12 cities: Delhi, Mumbai, Calcutta, Chennai, Bangalore, Hyderabad, Pune, Jaipur, Kochi, Patna, Ahmedabad and Ludhiana. The respondents included an equal number of men and women in the 30-45 age group, across Socio Economy Class A, B and C. The survey has an error margin of 2.8 %.

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