There are very few entertainment options in London which are free and, at the same time, really interesting. And which also have the &lsquoI was there&rsquo stamp. Portobello in Notting Hill before it gets dark is a favourite, the Changing of the Guard at Buckingham Palace is okay once in a lifetime but otherwise over-rated, and the musicians all over, especially at Covent Garden Square during the day, are top of the line. Diwali in Trafalgar Square is a recent addition, and so are the &lsquoLondon Free&rsquo weekends in September. Some idiots burnt down the Cutty Sark in Greenwich, sadly, and it is no fun to go and look at a cremated hull. But it has to be Speaker&rsquos Corner in Hyde Park which tops the list.
Especially in the 1970s and 1980s, an era when there was something for everybody and there wasn&rsquot much on the telly or the radio to go back to either. Most popular were the assorted creatively naked people, demanding a free world, a bit confusing to some of us who came from countries where the really important thing was to try and get some decent clothes. Pro- and anti-Thatcherites, Socialists, Gay Prides, End is Near, White Supremacy, Red Single Star Marxists, Irish Strugglers, Cyprus un-Dividers, Chagos Want to Go Back, and Messengers from God or planets beyond and many more &mdash there was pathos, human courage, entertainment and there was some very sharp heckling. Bible thumpers &mdash often wearing pink sunglasses for some reason &mdash attracted their share of awed spectators, many planted to work the crowd to a frenzy &mdash in a Punch-and-Judy kind of game which was good-humoured if not awe-inspiring. And the Greens were just about getting into their element &mdash they also had the prettiest girls and least number of bras per chest in their entourage.
To keep all this in line, there would usually be not more than a pair of unarmed elderly &lsquobobbies&rsquo loitering around casually, smiling at one and all, getting respect and giving it too, just to make sure that nobody took potshots at the Queen, took dogs off the leash, tripped over children playing nearby or cycled on the walking paths. And there would be intelligent hecklers who were like encyclopaedias &mdash the art of going for or against any line of thought and rapier-sharp wit was polished here.
So it was with high anticipation on a cloudy Sunday a month or so ago that I set off for Speaker&rsquos Corner, trotting on a light jog from the Bayswater Road end, past where Lakshmi Mittal lives, through Kensington Park, past extremely fat ducks, swans, crows, squirrels, magpies, past the Lido, along the Serpentine, towards the Reformer&rsquos Tree, determined to have some fun as well as a greasy hotdog in Hyde Park, Marble Arch end. I should have realised that things had changed when frighteningly fit pram mamas pelted past, pushing their babies in racing buggies. And there was a convention of what looked like men wearing bras cruising near Temple Gate.
But it is the sight of over 50 policemen on crowd management, cameras and videos in position, with many more parked in their vans, which really showed me how much things have changed. The place has gone, like much of the rest of the world, uni-polar. It starts with pro-Islam speakers taking on the rest of the world, not getting much of a response from assorted non-believers and disagreers, because shouting has replaced the jab and thrust of wit, and it ends with the various sects arguing with each other, while the skinheads and other visitors look on in amazement at debates being carried out in assorted tongues. The only thing flying in the air is excited spit.
A lonely cross-dresser walks around trying to get attention, his friend stands around with a &lsquo&rsquo signboard, and the most popular photographed person has to be the gentleman giving &lsquofree hugs&rsquo (and gropes, too). Yes, the direct descendant of the angels is there too, but he is reduced to swilling cheap plonk from a brown paper packet, when nobody is watching. The descendants of the skinheads take their &lsquoMarch for England&rsquo banners and walk sadly away, at which point the police also depart, and somebody brings out a football. And while the hotdog stall still used the same grease, they now also sell health food.
The End is Really Nigh There doesn&rsquot seem to be much left to argue about at Speaker&rsquos Corner. And they all insult each other&rsquos monarchs, but we aren&rsquot talking butterflies or those from the House of Windsor, either. The most interesting experience I had at Speaker&rsquos Corner this time was a huge Belgian Shepherd dog swimming in absolute harmony with the ducks and geese, and a solar-powered boat tied up nearby. There is a moral in that, somewhere.
Speaker&rsquos Corner in London is best visited on Sunday afternoons. Nearest tube and bus stop Marble Arch and/or Hyde Park Corner.
