Opinion

Bull's Eye

I am total embarrass for availing again and again kindhospital of 'Outlook'. But I facing a cute crisis. Crisis be my son. Fellow failin metric ...

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Bull's Eye
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I am total embarrass for availing again and again kindhospital of 'Outlook'. But I facing a cute crisis. Crisis be my son. Fellow failin metric and not progress one inch in life but then join Shiv Sena and quick as jiffybecome ten times more rich than hardworking father. From where his money come be mysterywrap in riddle wrap in anaemia.

Since I following Bapu and he followingBalasaheb naturally house chockfull with tension. One day fellow leave house holdinghockey stick. I asking, "Whyfor hockey stick, son?" "Going to cricketmatch, Daddy," fellow replaying. "Batting with hockey stick most difficult, son.Even Sachin not last one over." Fellow reply, "I not playing but watching Pakiteam play, Daddy. Hockey stick for bashing all antinational cheering Paki team!"

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Last wick fellow leaving house with petrol can. Again I beasking, "Where you going, son?" "I be going to put out fire, Daddy!""Alimentary law of physique son, fire put out with water and not with BharatPetroleum unleaded can!" "This be unmoral film 'Fire' made by foreignto destroy Bharat Mata, Daddy! We using fire to fight 'Fire'!" "Thatbe total nonsense, son! How you calling Shabana Azmi film unmoral beyond my imagine! Thatgracious lady working day and night servicing jhompri-patri!"

"Film total unmoral, Daddy!""Who you to decide moral?" I lashing out. "Your leader Balasaheb worshipMichael Jackson who keep adjusting underwear throughout dance not caring for mothers andsisters watching TV! That be moral? Moreover what if police be catching you to give thirddegree?" "We already check police, Daddy. They too against unmoral!" Afterfellow leave I call other Gandhians. We decide to make counter agitate. We announce datefor dharna. On dot we leaving house for tryst with destiny. But on reaching gate lo andbehold son and hooligan gang blocking way with lathis across path. My sixth sense smellingcrisis.

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"Son," I asking most gentle."You blocking path deliberate or maybe by mistake your lathi in way?"

"I blocking deliberate," fellow saysmiling like Pran. "Then it be okay," I telling. "Remember, I never forgiveif you be making mistake!" Before you be saying Jack Robin Singh we put reverse gearand return house to watch Prannoy Roy whole evening. As old saying go, discretion bebetter partner than valour.

Mumbai tiger full of fright,
Hating everyone in sight,
Charging left,
charging right—
Can it really face a fight?

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